What’s Your Preference?

Lingerie – I love It!


Brown lace bra and french knickers


Most weeks on my blog I do an post to share links to other bloggers’ work. For a whole year I hosted an interview with a sex writer alongside these links.  I am still interviewing only now it’s once a month instead of once a week. (pace yourself Posy!) One question I have always asked is this:

What’s your preference – naked or “dressed up” for sex?  If dressed up, how so?

I ask this question because I’m aware I use lingerie as a ‘crutch’. I feel way too vulnerable naked, and to start off with (foreplay stage) I don’t want to feel vulnerable. I also feel sexier with underwear on. I have big boobs (uh-huh – you noticed!) and with that territory came the concern that they are droopy. Being a teen in the era when topless models were featured in mainstream newspapers (The Sun & the Star). They always seemed to have perky boobs and upward-pointing nipples. No amount of reassurance from various boyfriends has made me feel more confident about them, so bras give me confidence.

Anyway, enough about me and my relationship with underwear, let me share some of the answers I’ve had to this question in my interview slot, but you will see that the answers vary hugely and (when people elaborate) their motivations are fascinating.


Deviant Succubus

I only dress up sexy for play parties or pictures. At home I am often doing the lazy thing of no bra, a pair of black leggings and a bandshirt. Those kinds of clothes are easy to take off and therefore perfect for foreplay and sex! Honestly, my sex life is pretty spontaneous so I’d always have to be dressed up if that were my preference. But I love dressing up sexy for fetish events and for pictures, and can take hours to get ready for those! 


Dressed up, although that state never lasts for long. It’s fun to get a tantalising glimpse of a partner’s body, or to tease them with, say, tight boxer shorts. Of course being dressed up is only enjoyable knowing that, at some point, you’re going to see one another naked.


Rachel Woe

Naked. Definitely. I love the feel of skin on skin. Perhaps if I had more disposable income, I’d make shopping for lingerie a new favorite hobby!


Barefoot Sub



Emmeline Peaches

Does ‘decorated in the cosy embrace of a thick blanket’ count?

Nah, just kidding, I tend to go for naked or very minimal aesthetic complements. These would usually be a body chain, a faux leather harness, or a collar. 

Oh, a collar *melts*


Dr J

Naked, but with jewelry.


May Moore

I like dressing up for sex on a date night. Sexy or slutty clothes – heels – stockings – you know the look! There are plenty of photos on my site with me dressed in such a way.

Nicci Heydon

I love to feel good about myself and clothes are a huge part of that for me. Even if I’m working, so it has to be all business, I usually try to find office attire that at least shows me in my best light. And of course, what I’m wearing underneath is nobody’s business but mine. As for sex, I’m not a planner, so while I might well be wearing something lacy or stringy it’s unlikely to be specifically for the other person’s benefit.

Beatrix B

I love dressing up for sex. Naturally, lingerie, heels, hose, etc. play into the mix, but I don’t mind a bit of costume wear either. I’m a very creative person, so that trait tends to spill over into many facets of my life. Sex is one of them.


Nero Black

I’ll take what I can get but as anyone who’s seen my Instagram account will know, I do prefer dress up. By which I mean she dresses up for my pleasure. Unfortunately I don’t have the physique for ‘dress up’ (mens choices are quite limited IMO).  Even more unfortunately (for me) my wife thinks the same, despite dressing sexy when we go out she takes it off as soon as she gets home. Ditto for any underwear or lingerie she has, being of the opinion that she should be ‘enough’ for me and that she shouldn’t have to dress up in order get me hard. [It’s a damn shame because she still has the body for it and would look great in whatever you see me posting on Instagram.]



I am nearly always naked for sex but what I wear or don’t wear will be entirely up to HisLordship. Sometimes he will request an item of clothing, or a specific ‘outfit’ but usually I am ‘au naturale’. If I want to feel sexy and entice him I will usually wear something rather than nothing. Sometimes I will dance or strip for him and I will select some lingerie that I feel sexy in, and usually add stockings and heels. The most I often end up wearing for sex is a blindfold lol.


I am hugely grateful to the bloggers, and other providers of sexy content who have shared their thoughts and opinions with me on my interview slot. I hope you enjoyed this ‘patchwork’ of opinions.



Image from Pixabay


12 thoughts on “What’s Your Preference?”

    1. Thanks for that comment, that’s what I thought too! This sort of thing really feeds my writing as I love to know why people do what they do.

    1. Ha ha, thank you, I am glad I can air some of my interviewee’s answers in a new way! Yeah, you’re not the only one!

  1. Pingback: Pleasure Can Be Found in So Many Ways - Posy Churchgate ~ Pillow Talk

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