Have you ever had your skirt fall off

while out for a walk? No? Just me then!

 

Daft things are always happening to me – I don’t know why.

Well I do, several of my faults conspire against me:

  • Usually running late
  • Clumsy / poor hand-eye coordination
  • Penchant for high heels, short skirts

When I was just 18 I was walking my dog and bumped into a boy I fancied (it wasn’t co-incidence, I’d seen him and his dog from my window so rushed to drag my dog out to engineer a conversation). As he was leaving the park with his boxer dog, I was arriving with my rather shy bitch. I stopped to say hello etc. but his dog got very interested in mine (wanting to sniff her butt). My dog was having none of it! Her attempts to keep out of reach caused both dogs to circle me, wrapping their leads tightly round my legs. I lost my balance and fell forwards onto my hands, bum in the air. I was so embarrassed, and the boy was probably not impressed, he certainly didn’t ask me on a date!

I fell headfirst into a guy’s lap on the underground last summer! I’d got onto the carriage with my friend, we were going to a matinee at the theatre. Before I could take my seat, next to a youngish man, the train pulled off. All my weight had been on one foot so the motion tipped me over sideways. I flailed about trying to regain my balance but my head kinda went into his lap. I was absolutely mortified. I was red-faced and apologetic but my friend (sitting opposite) was NO help, she just laughed at me, with an expression part shocked and part delighted.

Another train journey on a different day found me the victim of ‘man-spreading’. Sitting in a window seat, a man sat beside me, legs akimbo. Opposite me a pin-stripe suited guy was claiming space the same way. I was wearing a shortish dress & didn’t want to rub knees with either of them, so I sat with my legs tightly crossed. At my stop, I stood up but my tangled legs had gone numb! My ankle turned in my high heeled boots making me stumble into pin-stripe guy and tread on his toes! I felt pretty foolish but decided he deserved the pain!

I met a friend in a popular burger and chips restaurant off Oxford Street which I’d visited once previously. Before sitting down to consume our meal I needed to wash my hands. Dashing so that my food wouldn’t get cold, I shot into the bathrooms. I wondered briefly why a man was coming out! I gave him a bit of a glare, before I realised the error was mine! I had turned in the wrong direction and was standing in the gents’ washrooms! Exit a red-faced and apologetic Posy!

I should conclude with my click-bait story:

Ever had your skirt fall off while out for a walk?

Unsurprisingly it’s related to a dog walk. Seven years ago it was my lunch hour and I was exercising my dog. Still in my cute office outfit I wore a sweater, a short tiered skirt teamed with boots and thick tights. For warmth I grabbed a coat and swapped my boots for wellies. Aware my skirt was a bit short, I used to arrange it to sit on my hips not my waist. Striding round the field, dog off lead, I pulled to adjust my skirt, but a bit too hard. I caused it to slip completely off! It landed in a pool around my ankles! Shocked, I looked about  to see if anyone had witnessed my clothes malfunction. Nobody in sight. Luckily my quilted coat covered my state of undress to mid-thigh. I quickly pulled my skirt back up again & carried on walking.

 

Submitted for Masturbation Monday week #250 Image is from Pixabay.

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Comments (47)

  1. Reply

    Ah, Posy, this really made me laugh.

    I’ve had one experience of it. I took a skirt straight from the packaging to a dungeon session. When I changed I thought it felt loose but would be all right. Cuffed and blindfolded it took about 4 steps for the skirt to relocate around my ankles ?

  2. Reply

    Well would you believe it my skirt fell down once walkin to the train station for my commute to work – so funny – well didn’t feel like it at the time and thankfully i had a coat on so only my friend noticed as i yanked it up! x

  3. Reply

    It’s strange how we remember those embarrassing moments so vividly. Nice to have a laugh about it afterwards though ☺

  4. Nero

    Reply

    Very occasionally my sweatpants (hey, I’m at home – lounging!) will drop to my ankles. Usually when I am coming down the stairs holding something ie I can’t pull them up as they start to drop.

    • p0sy

      Reply

      Ha ha – had that happen too, usually if I have silky undies on beneath my sweatpants. You carry on being comfortably dressed at home Nero – no judgement here!

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  6. Reply

    Lol! I had a pair of jeans that I insisted on continuing to wear even although I’d lost weight and they were too big for me. The only thing holding them up was a belt. One morning on the way to the tube, the buckle on the belt broke, and my jeans rapidly started heading southward! I managed to grab a hold of them before they reached my knees, and about-turned to head back home and change my clothes! And I remember stepping off a ladder at work (I worked in a women’s fashion retailer at the time and was putting together a wall display) and the back seam of my skirt ripped open. Thankfully there were plenty of emergency replacement skirts in the stockroom!!

    • p0sy

      Reply

      Oh gosh – these are easily as crazy embarrassing as mine! Thanks for sharing xx

    • p0sy

      Reply

      Thanks Marie – it’s good to find humour in these things (after the embarrassment has worn off!)

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      • p0sy

        Reply

        I had to laugh at myself, I’m such a control freak, that when the plan DOESN’T come together, it was the only way to cope!

  8. Reply

    I have never had a skirt fall off but I have had it blow up whilst not wearing very much underneath! This post made me giggle Posy, all your little mishaps somehow just seem so you and I don’t even know why

    mollyx

  9. Reply

    Haha Pisy, these are fab, and very comforting for a fellow clumsy gal!
    I’ve ran square into a glass door thinking it was open and bouncing off it, been dragged face first into mud by my dog while trying to look cool in front of a guy I fancied, and more and more ??
    Lord knows how we kept our coordination when we met up ?

    • p0sy

      Reply

      Well that is honest, and I like it. I did hope people would laugh and not think “well she’s just odd!” xx

  10. Reply

    Yeah, I’ve done rough equivalents of all of those.

    Sad about the dog and the missed boy. That adolescent stuff hurts, when it hurts.

    Good stories, well told!

    • p0sy

      Reply

      I’m not alone,that makes me feel better. I wanted a boy with a bit of danger, I got to know him better later and that was NOT his middle name! So a good fail I think.

    • p0sy

      Reply

      Thank you – I was aiming for fun and sexy (not neurotic and crazy) so I told the tales just right. 😉

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    • p0sy

      Reply

      Ohhh cripes, sounds more tricky than my situation! I can’t wait to read your account. Thanks for adding your link & comments, I love when you stop by. 😉

    • p0sy

      Reply

      Oh that was cringey awkward, but you wrote it with such humour and giving nil fucks! I love it, may I put it on my next #SoSS post please?

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