My friend and sometime writing partner PJA Woode 
liked my #WickedWednesday post last week – so here’s his response on how he’s managed to put a little extra into his vanilla love life.

I felt inspired to add a few thoughts of my own to Posy’s wonderfully frank piece about her secret blogging lifestyle as, I too, am a secret sex blogger (well, writer rather than blogger) and I’m very proud to be one of the number of on-line friends to which she refers.

Like Posy, I also have a vanilla lifestyle.  However, mine relates more to what happens in the bedroom (yes, sex rarely extends beyond the door to that room).   

My OH is the most amazing, talented, caring, beautiful person in the world and I totally adore her.  We share the same values, laugh a lot and never get tired of each other’s company. But she really is the personification of vanilla in the bedroom department.  And while that is just fine, it is … well…just fine.  

She appreciates that I have wider needs and desires; she also feels that she can’t share them with me.  So she has given me the ‘green light’ to explore a bit further,  but one of the key provisos is that I keep it totally to myself.  She doesn’t want to know about it, or hear about it.  In fact, she wants – indeeds insists – that all this is kept totally secret.  Vanilla is her flavour and she is very happy with it, but vanilla is all she is comfortable being.

However, having heard from others who have tasted different, sometimes exotic flavours, I have often wished there was a way of trying them out…even if only a bit.  Moreover, as the years are passing by, you (and for that read ‘I’) never know how long that most important item – that located between a bloke’s legs – will keep rising to the occasion!

So, a little like Posy, I have discovered a wonderful, sexy world out there through writing erotic stories to accompany the most erotic of adult films on FrolicMe, while also researching and writing articles about sex.  I have met some wonderfully supportive, creative and talented writers and artists who share my passion for all (ok, most) things erotic. Last summer, for example, I took part in the Smutathon event, where several erotic writers and bloggers wrote non stop in aid of several very relevant and worthwhile charities.  That was a real first for me, taking me way, way out of my comfort zone;  it was great fun and I did write a heck of a lot of material.   

Emboldened by all this,  I have also started to collect a few erotic items – wonderful jewel tools (cock rings and various delightful variants) and sex toys to enhance my own self-pleasure sessions.  

Through all these ventures I have re-discovered a sexuality that I feared I’d lost.  I have found a new energy within (which actually helped me recover from some very poor health) and have tapped into an inner creativity that I just love. I guess, in short, I have reconnected with my sexual self.

And finally, like Posy, I keep all this secret.  Only I keep it very, very secret – far more so than Posy. Indeed, this is very much part of the understanding with my OH.  One day I would love to share all this with her and in time that might just happen, but it won’t be in the immediate future.

So my Twitter account (@pjawoode) is locked on private (I do have a handful of followers, but I have to be careful and need to ensure that I can trust them, though I do love sharing things with those who have the same interests and passions (yes, kinks) as me, but I don’t have a blog. So Posy is very kindly posting this for me.  You can read my work on the most wonderful of erotic websites – FrolicMe.   If it’s any good, or if it presses any of your buttons, do leave some (positive, I hope!) feedback there.



Thank you Woody for sharing, I’d love to point you – my Dark Darlings – to my favourite of his short stories.  I love it because it is written as if it could be true, a recollection from his youth, and also because it is about boots – a sexy obsession of mine.  (You can also read what Woody and I wrote together, the first of what I hope will be a list of collaborations!)

Comments (3)

  1. Reply

    I find this both uplifting and sad. Sad in the aspect that the OH wants no part of it. That's a hole in both lives where everything else is shared. In varying degrees it's not uncommon to find this hole and often the worst part is that it is underhand. I'm glad that the OH knows and that it's been her conscious decision to not want to be involved.

    And that's where the uplifting part comes in. Being able to explore within those boundaries and find freedom in expressing ideas and concepts that would otherwise be suppressed.

    Oh, and Posy must be a nicely wicked writing partner to bounce around ideas with.

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