Hello my Dark Darlings,
#SoSS Sharing the Male Perspective
I attended #Eroticon last weekend, which if you’re a reader rather than a blogger you might not know much about. It’s where us kinksters meet to learn how to do this ‘sex blogging’ lark better, safer, to reach a wider audience and (hopefully) how to earn money from it! While we’re there we get to meet each other, to turn on-line-contacts into friends and advisers. Most bloggers keep our kinks and fetishes under wraps, hiding behind false names and avatars, but at #Eroticon we can be loud and proud, dress in what our ‘inner self’ likes (for me that meant my outfit included boots and a corset!) but some were even more out-there than that!
I also met the event’s sponsors and learned more about what they do, whilst getting a chance to try out a little of what they sell/the service they provide.
@Doxy @HotOctopuss @SheetsoSF @ElectraStim @mysteryvibe @fetishdotcom @Bijouxindiscret @LoveGivr @TheRubyGlow @sextoysuk, @eropartner – @myzumio.
Unfortunately I didn’t get to meet Kilted Wookie at #Eroticon, but he’s kindly provided me with an interview, so I’m still able to get answers to all my nosey questions for you guys to read! Before we get into that though, I want to do my usual sharing of links which have caught my eye this week. Compiling it I realised there was a theme building …. they are all from a male PoV this week, some erotica and some opinion pieces. Please read and perhaps you’ll find a new ‘voice’ from whom you want to hear more.
Fishnet stockings – Where’s the Catch? @HisLordshipuk
On matters of Men Romance and Insecurity @Charlton_Todd
Sex is Ace! @Bibulous1
Everyone is feeling Sad this week @NeroTweetsHere
A Handful of Fun @A_M_Harding
A Girl’s Clitoral Piercing @PJAWoode
The Red Brassiere by Elliott Henry (currently taking a rest from Twitter)
- What made you decide to write a sex blog?
It all started back in about 2001. I’ve always enjoyed reading erotica on sites like Literotica. The quality varied from excellent to downright awful. Male “writers” in particular seemed to be more interested in describing it purely as an exercise in mechanics: how hard, how deep, how many strokes, etc. The women in these “stories” were simply a means for applying the aforementioned statistics. I was sure I could do better, so I started writing and submitting some of my own. My original blog was simply somewhere, other than erotica sites, where I posted my work.
Skip forward to early 2011 when I discovered Twitter and the blogging community. I was still writing the occasional story, but I was chatting to bloggers and reading and commenting on their work.
Skip forward again to January 2015 when two very persuasive women, Cheryl Kaye and Charlie Powell (or @HornyGeekGirl and @sexblogofsorts to use their twitter names) convinced me to join in with #SinfulSunday on the grounds there was a shortage of cock on said meme. From posting photos, it was only a short step to writing my opinions on things sex related, and by participating in memes such as #MasturbationMonday, #TMITuesday and #WickedWednesday, I started to write more and grow my audience.
There have been a number of ups and downs along the way, but that’s pretty much the potted version of how I got to be where I am today.
- What’s behind the title of your blog or your blogging “name”?
If you weren’t aware, there are two online versions of me: Kilted Wookie and The Zen Nudist. They started of fairly distinct and separate, but the lines between them have become increasingly blurred to the point where they pretty much coexist fairly peacefully.
Kilted Wookie stems simply from the fact that I am Scottish (kilted) and particularly hirsute (wookie). One former partner once endearingly referred to me as Chewbacca’s body-double. It kind of stuck.
The Zen Nudist stems from the fact that I do spend a fair bit of time sans clothes, particularly when the weather is warmer, and I have a bit of a philosophical bent, so the two just sort of went together.
- Describe your blog in a nutshell:
My blog has been through a number of guises. As I mentioned, originally it was a site purely for my stories. Next I started adding my photos, and then I started including thoughts and opinions. Then, in one of my blacker spells in 2016, I ripped the whole lot down.
First to return in late 2016 were my stories, under the banner Kilted Wookie Writes… There’s a slight irony there in that, apart from my #SmutMarathon assignments, I haven’t written anything since March 2016.
Kilted Wookie’s Photo Album began in February 2017 when I decided to take the plunge and join in with #FebPhotoFest. I still had the back-up of my old blog, so I was able to include almost all of my old photos. I haven’t missed a #SinfulSunday since my return and I also did the #FebPhotoFest again this year.
Finally, April 2017 saw the birth of The Zen Nudist. This is where I share my thoughts and opinions on life, the universe and everything. It’s a mix of sex and mental health and is simply somewhere I go to howl at the moon where I need more than 280 characters to express myself.
Although all three blogs are separate, earlier this year I took the step of merging them into a single site. As I said, the lines between the online versions of me are merging.
I also have a tumblr site: Kilted Wookie’s Sexual Artistry, where I share some of my own, more explicit photography, and reblog other images that I like.
- What is your favourite type of adult toy?
I’m not really a “toy person”. I’m happy enough to use them on my partners, but they aren’t something I’ve used for myself. I suspect, the nearest thing to a “toy” would be the internet for the purposes of accessing erotica and the blogs I follow.
- If you were sent to a desert island (with no power issues) name the 1 adult toy you’d take with you:
Based on my previous answer, it would have to be my laptop or my tablet.
- What’s your current sexuality? At what age did you realise this was the right ‘fit’ for you?
I am, by my own admission, boringly straight. I can appreciate male beauty but sexually it does nothing for me at all. So, yeah, for me it’s women all the way.
- What’s your preference – naked or “dressed up” for sex? If dressed up, how so?
It’s probably no real surprise that I’m a fan of naked. There’s something about the intimacy of skin next to skin that can’t be beaten.
Having said that, I enjoy and have participated in CMNF (Clothed Male, Naked Female). It’s a dynamic, particularly within the D/s side of my nature that appeals to me.
- Is there a kink or fantasy you’re yearning to try?
I don’t think so. I’ve been sexually active for the better part of three decades and in that time I think I’ve pretty much worked out the things that I like and dislike. I’m always open to suggestion, but I know the activities/kinks I enjoy and if I can continue to indulge them, I’ll have no complaints.
- Name the fictional being or species you’d most like to have an encounter with:
Totally random, but Anne McCaffrey’s Dragons of Pern.
- Anal sex – Meh or Yay?
I can take it or leave it. If the woman I’m with wants and enjoys it, great, happy to oblige. If it’s something she doesn’t want/like, I don’t miss it. It’s absence or presence will never be a deal-breaker for me.
- Sex needn’t always be serious – do you have a funny moment to share?
I don’t have any specific moments that come to mind, but I do agree that to enjoy sex fully, it needs to be fun; whether that be intentional or not. In my student days I’ve had flatmates walk in on me when I’ve been “entertaining”. I live with a cat, and all that that entails. I’ve had any number of humorous fails and mishaps that you never see in the movies. If you can’t have a laugh when you’re having sex, you’re probably doing it wrong (or you’re doing it so right it should be in a movie).
- Sexting – love it or hate it?
- Which mainstream film depicts your favourite erotic scene?
I’m old enough to remember the likes of 9½ Weeks and Basic Instinct. As I indicated above, sex in movies, while it can be “erotic” and “arousing” tends to present an image of sanitised perfection where the phone never rings, you never get your arm trapped under your partner trying to change position, end up with a mouthful of hair or any of the other little mishaps that invariably happen in “real” sex. Maybe the closest to “real” I have ever seen in a movie was the scene with Emma Thompson and Jeff Goldblum in “The Tall Guy”.
- Do you watch porn?
Not really, no. I like still image (especially black and white) erotic photography, but as a whole, pornographic films do nothing for me. The almost asthmatic moaning and panting is particularly off-putting. Amatuer porn, where the participants are simply fucking and enjoying it rather than trying to put on a performance is more to my taste, but I generally don’t bother.
- Nominate your favourite adult film:
For the reasons given above, I don’t really have one.
- Before you go, please tell us 1 adult blog (aside from yours) which we must add to our reading list:
I always like discovering new blogs. My current favourite is Jadis over at Tits & Test Tubes.
I would also recommend my fellow #FebPhotoFest participant submiss34f for some truly wonderful photography.
Thank you so much for sharing your more ‘private’ side with me and my Dark Darlings!