I wonder if you can remember your earliest memories relating to sex?
I always imagined that people didn’t really have sex fantasies until they hit puberty, because the body wasn’t ready to act on them until that point. But now I think we may have them earlier but don’t process them as being sexual, or not until we look back because we wonder where our ‘kinks’ came from.
When I wrote the erotic tale ‘Fine Day for a Picnic’ I touched on my early experience of getting a thrill from being tied up. I was really young, maybe about 7, around the same time that I loved watching the Scooby-Do cartoon, not just to be scared (by the ghosts/ monsters) but because I longed to be Daphne, who was forever being held captive and tied up until the rest of the gang rescued her. In these scenarios the vulnerability appealed to me,
Later in life I found the idea ever more appealing, especially the way it was portrayed in films:
In the plots of these films, capturing the female character is usually a vehicle for the villain to lure the hero into his clutches or make him more vulnerable, but a helpless girl under threat of being ravished against her will is tantalising to me, hey the heroes being tied up gives me a sexual frisson too!
I can’t think why it took me so long to realise bondage was my kink, when I think of what I have got a thrill from watching over the years. Spanking and whipping is often a theme of period dramas, and the link with this and the ‘non-consent’ scenarios began to make fantasies blossom in my head as puberty sent hormones racing round my body. A lot is made of the “sexism” of the portrayal of supporting woman in the films back in the sixties and seventies, but I don’t doubt that in those less PC days (when people kept their perversions on the quiet) the film makers knew they were giving the audience illicit thrills with when they portrayed strong, dominant male heroes and villains using threat and restraint to take what pleasure they wanted from the helpless female characters. O the flimsy, easily torn, costumes, the bodices laced tightly so they pushed breasts up like ripe fruit, how I longed to be dressed like that and feel the burning gaze of a lust-filled rascal rake over my trembling body.
Are we sure ladies got the vapours? Might they not have been getting turned on but embarrassed about the liquid in their loins? Maybe they wanted to be picked up and carried to a chaise longue by a handsome fellow in tight britches once they had swooned!!
I’d love to hear which big screen scenes grabbed your
attention from pre-pubescence to now and whether you think it affected or triggered your kinks, please comment & share
, you might give me and my Dark Darlings something new films to whack off to!
For a later blog, perhaps we could all get thinking about the strong female roles which may have inspired ‘Dominatrix’ kinks in some of us – Mrs Emma Peel (lots of leather!)
Xena Warrior Princess (less clothes, more leather straps and armour) and Lara Croft … there are several to conjure with!