The Birth of your Sexual Curiosity

Hello my Dark Darlings!  It’s been a while I know, I left you alone and wondering  (wandering? having a solo play?) while I’ve been away.  I’m back now – so slip into something less comfortable and I’ll spill the beans!
I had a school reunion recently, people I hadn’t seen for many years.  The girl I was back then was very different from the woman I have become … but the foundations were there I realised, because a couple of them asked me “Remember those sexy stories you used to write? We all passed them round and read them.”  I had pretty much forgotten I used to do that – how funny that I have begun doing that again just this year! At the time I was inexperienced but had a good imagination!  Of course my audience knew no more real facts than I did, so they were entertained and titillated by my scribblings!  
So I’d say my sexual awakening began reading ‘adult’ passages in books, and I read loads!  These too got passed around at school,  usually the corner of the pages were folded down at the dirty bits!  ‘The Fog’ by James Herbert was pretty depraved and all Harold Robbins’ books were popular as was ‘Lace’ Shirley Conran.  A personal favourite of mine was ‘The Virgin Soldiers’ by  Leslie Thomas.   My mother was fine with me reading these books (she got me a copy of Emanuelle by E Arsan)  so no need to be sneaky about it.  I’ll admit to creeping into my sibling’s room and borrowing ‘The Story of I’ by Fiona Richmond – what an eye-opener! it probably fired up my early interest in the balance of power so important in BDSM.
Soon I moved onto Victorian erotica, and I loved it! The language is so quaint (quim and cunny being the current term for pussy in these stories) but woah! plenty of spankings and floggings.  The gents are lusty and the girls are saucy and with much bedroom hopping, there follows ‘spending’ and sighing.
My next erotica discovery was the Black Lace books – erotica written for women by women (they made it hard for a male writer to slip under their radar!)  These novels had an entire story- a beginning, middle and end – the plots were choc full of sexual adventures.  The buyer choses the era and genre which most appealed.  I had two favourites about secret sex clubs where club members partake in all manner of displays and private parties.  If you’ve read my ‘Cleaner Close’ series you can see they inspired many of my fantasies!
In more recent times my reading needs are being satisfied by a Kindle.  I’m able to download all manner of erotica to read without giving away what I’m up to – erotica can be read on a train or a plane so long as it doesn’t make me squirm in my seat (too much) or pounce on a fellow passenger because I’m overcome with lust induced by my reading matter!  
Update – 2018 onwards:  The enlightening discovery of the Literotica website, with its short stories in so many different genres, I can stick to what I like or try something new.  It’s all so accessible and straightforward that it’s inspired me to unleash my dirty fantasies and write again (full circle to school days!). The kind feedback I began getting from discerning readers encouraged me to set up this blog with the intention of building a following of my own.
My Dark Darlings, please share in the comments what started you off on your sexual journey.  
Did you discover a stash of porn/ girly magazines (as one of my followers described to me)?  He finds he now prefers his partners not to shave as those early images of girls with a full bush had a formative effect on his ‘kink’.  Were you the very shy type who tried to satisfy your early curiosity by looking through the underwear and bikini sections of your mother/sister’s clothes catalogues?  In a book I read recently the hero thought he knew all about sex (despite being a virgin) because he’d watched farm animals, and he was surprised to find (on his wedding night) that copulation was often done face to face!

Final question, as a connoisseur of good erotica, what did you think of Fifty Shades of Grey?  Did you read it at all, or was it just an eye opener for slightly prudish women?  I had to read the first one, there was too much buzz about it for me not to.  I found the writing rather repetitive and the scenarios were tame compared with what I’m used to reading.  Could you believe Anastasia was a virgin, bearing in mind her age and attractiveness?  I wondered why she went along with Grey’s kinks whilst seemingly finding them so disgusting and repellent;  her end game being to revert him to vanilla!

In my experience, if you start to dabble with dark and enjoy it, you never want to entirely go back!  Missionary, with the lights out, at bed-time – boring!  But perhaps you can tell me what you think about that too.

I have written a chapter in the anthology Discovery how I took my own BDSM journey to the next level. You can buy it from Amazon. Prior to that journey I wrote this piece where I put my thoughts out there for all my lovely readers to comment on, and I got fantastically useful feedback.

Please share dear readers, I’d love to get your comments and insights.

2 thoughts on “The Birth of your Sexual Curiosity”

  1. Hi Posy,
    I must admit to, as a young adolescent, perusing the pages of the then "Gratton" catalogue (I have no idea what became of THAT publication) at the underwear section and marveling at how the shape and form of the women's vulvas (can I use such a medical term here – I must admit I quite like it) varied. So yes, my intro to seeing women (as opposed to the girls at school) were from catalogues. Thank you for bringing that memory back 🙂
    In other news, you mentioned Victorian erotica, have you ever read Delta Of Venus?
    Thanks for such a brilliant blog post. There can't be many of us that don't think back to the past from time-to-time and this was, for me at least…inspirational !

  2. Hello Telugu1 – thank you for sharing your memories. I guess internet shopping has now totally killed the catalogue shopping as was, but I too remember Grattan and Freemans! I get a lovely tingle when something dredges up a memory I haven't thought of for years! Glad you enjoy it too! I have read Delta of Venus, about the same time as Emanuelle, and I still have it in a box labelled 'bedtime reading'!

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